We recently came home to find this letter on the counter from our Yorkshire Terrier, Sam.
Dear Kibble and Treat Providers,
While you were gone . . .
Someone accidentally had an accident accidentally in the house. However, don’t worry—it occurred in the guest bedroom closet where no one will notice for days.
Someone tore all of the stuffing out of my friend, Frog, and strewed it across the den floor like polyester snowflakes in June.
Someone jumped up on the neatly made bed and scratched the bedspread into a comfy nest for napping.
Someone scattered dog food across the kitchen floor in order to find just the right kibble to nibble.
Someone sloshed water out of the dog bowl while getting a drink.
Someone left nose prints on the front door glass while barking at the evil mail man.
Someone perched on top of the sofa pillows as a watchtower to guard the house.
Someone got into the bathroom wastebasket—AGAIN—and dumped Kleenex, Q-tips, and cotton balls on the tiles.
Someone grabbed the end of the toilet paper roll and ran through the house with it streaming behind him.
Someone couldn’t wait for you to get home and greeted you at the door with twists, turns, yips, and kisses.
Someone promises none of these things will EVER happen again . . . well, at least until you are gone the next time.